Eternal panic response

Facebook makes it uncomfortably obvious when my friends’ associate with pond scum

ohnoproblems:

i’m going to reiterate what i said yesterday. being a man or identifying with masculinity does not make you inherently bad. it means that you will be afforded structural benefits the rest of us lack. it means that others will present you with countless opportunities to engage in misogyny. it means some of us will never trust you or be comfortable around you because of past experiences with other men, regardless of whether you think that’s fair or not. it means you need to listen to us when we speak of the ways you hurt us, and understand when you speak to us that society is far, far more receptive to your voice.

it does not make you inherently evil, it means society indulges you with the capacity to be evil and get away with it because it is evil done in socially-sanctioned methods by the patriarchy.

amphiaria:

you say that you’d like to go out on a date with me. I tell you that there is a form that you need to fill out first. your brow furrows with confusion as I hand you a piece of paper. you look down at it. there is only one question:

  1. if u were a sim what would ur traits be

Cycling whilst fat: two separate dickheads lean out of car windows to yell at me about my body. ‘Want some fries with that’ & ‘get off the road, fatty’.

This is fucking street harassment.

I’m sure these fine upstanding wastes of air were just concerned about my health tho :) :) :)

would donations of money be helpful to you / something that you're comfortable accepting?

girlkisser2k14:

this would be immensely helpful honestly, there’s a donate button on my blog, but only do this if you feel comfortable doing so and it won’t take anything you need. we’ve been basically out of food for a week now (right now we’ve got some dry pasta and some peanut butter layng around and not much else, no veggies no meat) but we’re managing to scrape by

If you have any money at all, please help out someone who’s in a very very vulnerable situation wrt her abuser.

girlkisser2k14:

monetizeyourcat:

Read More

EDIT 9/1/2014: cat has blanked her blog and thus the original readmore is unreadable. i’m going to insert an image of it here.

image

i’m going to address this one point at a time and this is the last thing i have to say about this because i am tired of you telling lies and half-truths to paint me as some kind of fucking monster.

1. i never manipulated you. i never did anything. the context of our relationship was originally a friendship; we became friends in about mid-2014 when i was 18 years old. i invited you to a group chat shortly after that consisted of me and a few trans girl friends.

2. the way you told me you liked me was back in january/february you called me on skype dead on your ass drunk while i was going through a suicide crisis and told me that i couldn’t leave you and i couldn’t DO THIS TO YOU because you LOVED me so much. i spent the next 1-2 hours in a call with you trying to calm you down and in the middle of that went and fucking threw up so the pills i took wouldn’t kill me. the context there is you were telling a 19 year old girl who had recently started her transition that you were in love with her and she coudln’t leave you, while you, someone almost ten years older, were fucking drunk on everclear.

3. the relationship became sexual when you started fucking flirting with me. i was never, ever, ever even REMOTELY sexual interested in you because i’m not attracted to you! because i was scared of you! because the way you behaved in group chats was frightening!

4. i fucking resent so hard you turning our sexual relationship into “i was so uncomfortable with fucking this 19 year old” when literally you’re the one who did it. the first time we met we had a fucking threesome within two hours; you asked to cuddle me and then you and your girlfriend started groping me and kissing me and taking my clothes off. that is exactly what fucking happened and i don’t know how the fuck you’re going to dispute that when i could just ask her myself. (not to mention the weird shit you did when you wanted to fuck me! but hey let’s not talk about that since apparently you “remember it differently” and i guess that means it’s unfair of me to bring up how you fucking me reminded me of the time i was raped at 9 years old!)

5. i came to other people because you fucking scared me and i wanted confirmation that i wasn’t being crazy; i wanted confirmation from others that i wasn’t making up everything about you and that i had good reasons to be scared. funnily enough, several of these people thought similar things!! who fucking knew! there’s a fucking REASON when we remade the group chat we DIDN’T INVITE YOU UNTIL YOU MADE A BIG FUCKING FUSS ABOUT IT; WE ARE SCARED OF YOU AND THE WAY YOU TALK AND OPERATE AND HAVE BEEN FOR MONTHS

6. i came up to visit you in portland after you screamed for hours at my friends who were housing me in california and hten ORDERED them to not tell me about it. i found out about it anyway and found out how scared they were of you and the way you told them that i wasn’t allowed to know things! you screamed at them because i spent too much money while in their care and then told them you were moving me to portland all while not telling me!

7. you told me i was “visiting” portland. you didn’t tell me i was moving there. you didn’t tell me i was moving in with you. you didn’t tell me i was going to be the SECOND homeless girl moving into your 2-bedroom apartment for a total of 4 people on no furniture. you told everyone EXCEPT For me, deliberately, because you knew i’d be uncomfortable with it. because i was! after i came up to visit you you kept talking to me about “settling down” and “getting my things set up here” and i was confused! incredibly confused! i didn’t find out you intended for me to fucking move in with you until i was already on the train up to visit talking to friends on skype. i had no fucking clue what was happening because YOU TOLD PEOPLE NOT TO TELL ME; YOU UNDERMINED MY AGENCY AND TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME BECAUSE YOU WANTED ME TO BE YOUR FUCKING GIRLFRIEND

8. i finally became okay with moving in with you; i had a crush on your spouse, with which you didn’t really have a relationship! you were on the verge of being separated and were staying in seperate rooms. i asked you permission to hang out with her because i felt that would be polite; you gave it, happily. i asked your permission to become intimate with her and you gave it, in much the same fashion. i later found out she asked you if she could be intimate with me, and you approved it. about a week into my stay with you she and i became intimate, you walked in on it, and got extremely upset. at one point we locked the door so you wouldn’t walk in on us and you became physically and verbally violent. i started making plans to leave and you had to fucking walk out and almost drag me back in because you didn’t want me gone. we never fucking asked you to move out or even IMPLIED it. i started sleeping in sam’s room because your violence and anger made me uncomfortable and scared, and you took that as me somehow fucking blacklisting you or intentionally trying to hurt you. we didn’t fucking force you to move out; you went to seattle to hang out with your girlfriend and while over there messaged us over skype letting us know that you were getting a divorce and moving out. we didn’t do SHIT in that department, that was entirely. fucking. you.

9. i literally never claimed anyone was a teenager other than myself idk where the fuck this is coming from but hey! your targets of abuse and manipulation just so happen to be young trans kids in their late teens/early 20s so What Do I Know

10. oh boy. the greatest cover up ever; lie and then say “i’m going to get accused of lying”, how completely fucking undone and how unheard of as a tactic of abuse!

you moved me into your house under false pretenses, treated me with violence and subjected me to a stressful and disgusting home environment, and then fucking moved out when you got mad at me friendzoning you. that’s what fucking happened you absolute child